Today is my first day back to work after being off for 8 weeks. I've never been off of work for so long in my life. Even though I've been off of work, I've never worked so hard in my life! Being a Mom is the hardest job there is and it's been the hardest thing I've done. It's also been the best thing in the whole world. I'd like to say it's nice to be back at work but that would be a lie. I didn't want to come back. I still don't want to be here. Most of my co-workers are great, the job itself isn't that challenging but enough to keep me thinking and yet all I want to do is go home and change diapers and wash my baby's clothes. I guess it's the reward. I don't find the reward of working to be the same. In a weird way I would get excited about accomplishing tasks and attending meetings. Now I get excited when Silas smiles at me and sleeps for more than 4 hours. My perspective and priorities are definitely different. And I'm ok with that. Nick and Silas gave me a going back to work gift. I put it right next to my monitor and have been looking at it all day. I've checked in with my Mom only once. Silas is in his vibrating seat and Jack is sleeping so my Mom is resting. Nick will continue to drop Silas off in the a.m. until something changes. This works out pretty well. My Dad is also resting - in the hospital. He's been dizzy and they're monitoring him. I hope to have good news soon and will definitely keep you all posted. 
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Back to work
Today is my first day back to work after being off for 8 weeks. I've never been off of work for so long in my life. Even though I've been off of work, I've never worked so hard in my life! Being a Mom is the hardest job there is and it's been the hardest thing I've done. It's also been the best thing in the whole world. I'd like to say it's nice to be back at work but that would be a lie. I didn't want to come back. I still don't want to be here. Most of my co-workers are great, the job itself isn't that challenging but enough to keep me thinking and yet all I want to do is go home and change diapers and wash my baby's clothes. I guess it's the reward. I don't find the reward of working to be the same. In a weird way I would get excited about accomplishing tasks and attending meetings. Now I get excited when Silas smiles at me and sleeps for more than 4 hours. My perspective and priorities are definitely different. And I'm ok with that. Nick and Silas gave me a going back to work gift. I put it right next to my monitor and have been looking at it all day. I've checked in with my Mom only once. Silas is in his vibrating seat and Jack is sleeping so my Mom is resting. Nick will continue to drop Silas off in the a.m. until something changes. This works out pretty well. My Dad is also resting - in the hospital. He's been dizzy and they're monitoring him. I hope to have good news soon and will definitely keep you all posted. 
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Good luck! This first week will be hard, but it'll become normal after a while. The picture is a wonderful gift! I hope your dad is feeling better soon too!
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